Shay's journal

Shay: I have so many mixed feeling about Tally coming to the smoke. I know that I am the person that told her to come here but nobody seems to be friends with her. They are so suspicious, I'd wish that they would accept that she is not a spy nor a traitor. She is my friend and it hurts to have her being excluded from this society. I wish that people would believe me when I say that she is innocent. She has done nothing wrong. She does seem a bit different, but that doesn't mean that I don't trust her. I will always trust her, even though I will always trust her it doesn't mean that I will always like her, it is like she has taken David away from me. It's not fair, David was my friend first, she can't take him away from me. And today she still hasn't come home yet. I think that she is with David. It seems like they are becoming more than more than just friends. I don't mean to be jealous but I feel as if David should be mine. I don't even know why he likes Tally. Tally isn't good at anything, she can barley survive in the smoke. She probably wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for me. I have done everything that I can to help her and in return this is what she gives me. I feel bad for myself. So much so, that I have thought about going back to Uglyville so that I can turn pretty. They I could be in a party everyday, always having fun, I could be carefree. Not ever having to worry about David and Shay. Maybe to get David to like me I could go to Uglyville so that I could become pretty after the operation. And once I'm done with the operation then I could come back to the smoke, then David might like me. I could be the only pretty person in all of the smoke.

I am thinking more about the thought that Tally may be a traitor! What if she is, the technology of the special circumstances is likely to be more advanced than the things that David uses to detect trackers when they first come to the smoke. Maybe the things that David was using was obsolete, maybe Tally does have trackers on her and we just don't know it, or maybe Tally has some tracker that not even she knows about. Maybe I should just go back to a regular place, like Newpretty town or Uglyville. Nothing is going the way that I planned. I though that it would just be me and David together all the time. Tally has been less of a friend. But there is nothing that I can do about it. Maybe after Tally has been here for a while people will get used to her, she will loose attention. Maybe then David will pay more attention to me. But until then I will just have to wait.